Billie Eilish revealed that physical insecurities led her to adopt her signature baggy wardrobe in a Dazed interview published on Thursday.
When asked about her decision to wear loose-fitting clothes from the beginning of her career, the 18-year-old explained, “The only reason I did it was ‘cos I hated my body.”
Often referred to as a “rule-breaker” for diverging from the aesthetics of young female musicians before her, Eilish denied making a contrived effort to dress differently; rather, the singer said she simply didn’t identify with her predecessors’ images.
“I’d be like, ‘What rules are there?‘” she said, continuing, “I didn’t consciously go, ‘I’m not gonna do that, I’m gonna do this.’ I (just) didn’t think of myself as being in the realm of those people. I was never comparing myself to them.”
An EP, an LP, a few singles, and five Grammy Awards later, Eilish’s fashion choices have remained consistent from the start — always baggy but varying from neon green streetwear to a custom Chanel tweed suit on the red carpet.
She’s become so used to the style that she admitted to barely recognizing herself without it.
“There was a point last year where I was naked and I didn’t recognize my body ‘cos I hadn’t seen it in a while,” she said, continuing, “I would see it sometimes and be like, ‘Whose body is that?'”
The singer said that her body image has since improved, although she still faces insecurities.
“It’s not that I like (my body) now, I just think I’m a bit more OK with it,” she shared.
Just because Eilish has become slightly more comfortable in her own skin, the artist admitted that she still faces judgment for her appearance, despite her efforts to stand up against those trying to sexually objectify her.
When she was photographed in a white tank top in June 2019, Eilish recalled seeing comments like, “‘I don’t like her any more because as soon as she turns 18 she’s a w—-.'”
“Like, dude. I can’t win. I can-not win,” she told Dazed.
However, Eilish hasn’t stayed silent on the matter. In March, the singer called out body-shamers during an interlude at her Miami concert and played a video of herself stripping down to a bra.
“Some people hate what I wear, some people praise it. Some people use it to shame others, some people use it to shame me,” she said in the voiceover.
“If I wear what is comfortable, I am not a woman. If I shed the layers, I’m a s—,” Eilish said, adding, “Though you’ve never seen my body, you still judge it, and judge me for it. Why?”
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